Ode to Roasted Pumpkin Seeds

Here’s a recipe for Spiced Honey Roasted Pumpkin Seeds. I’m not sure why you would even look at this, but in case you haven’t had roasted pumpkin seeds in a while and want to confirm that you too hate them, you should go ahead and make some.

I know, I know, it’s such a shame to see those pumpkin seeds go to waste during the pumpkin carving process. In addition to being beckoned into the waste-not-want-not world of consuming the seeds, there are numerous benefits of the little guys. Not unlike an assortment of other seeds the benefits touted are so numerous I’m surprised they’re not put into a liquid based drink and sold by hawkers of magical elixirs.

Spiced Honey Roasted Pumpkin Seeds Recipe

The pumpkin seed has nutrients ranging from magnesium to copper, protein and zinc. They contain plant compounds that contain antioxidants. Step right up!  These little seeds can help you lose weight by burning calories for you! Step right up! Get your roasted pumpkin seeds!  Add fiber to your diet by putting a handful of this goodness called pumpkin seeds right straight down your throat.

So every year my wife, let me refer to her as Cynthia for the time being, washes and spices and roasts the pumpkin seeds from the pumpkins our children have carved. Let me be more precise – the pumpkins that my children start carving and I begrudgingly complete – every year becoming totally consumed by the artistry of the carving by the time I get to the last one.

Cynthia is of the healthy sort and is fully engaged with the seeds – not just pumpkin  – but any seeds that can be sprinkled here or there to add fiber and all of the above magicality. The problem – I could call it challenge, but I won’t – is that nobody in our family eats the roasted seeds. Every year I taste the roasted seeds in what becomes a reminder to me that I don’t like seeds. Don’t get me wrong, I love the seasonings – salt, cinnamon, honey, garlic, paprika and whatever else can be placed on the slippery surface of a seed (by the seashore). I just don’t like the seed. And it looks like nobody else in our family likes the seed. Cynthia will have a few, but is more into the process and the girls have not touched a seed in a few years.

My son, we can discuss him using the name Hoyt, seems to be the last one in our family that is willing to eat the roasted pumpkin seeds. He even took a container full to school for a snack. But this is the same boy that loves tormenting his classmates with his love of raw seaweed as a snack item. If I didn’t know that we paid good money for the boy via the in vitro fertilization process, I would have questioned the seed that created him.

I guess I’m saying that no matter the flavoring added to the exterior of a pumpkin seed I’m a big no go on the eating of said seeds. It may have to do with the texture of the seeds or the fear that a shard will break off and cut my throat wide open on the way down to the stomach.

My dislike of the seed started with trying to understand the consumption of sunflower seeds. It seemed to be the perfect carrier for salt into the human body. Beyond that, the process of taking in a mouth full of tiny seeds and turning one’s mouth into an old fashioned threshing machine seemed like a lot of work.  From my research, bird seed eaters tend to be people trying to give up smoking or nervously planning a bank heist. Sorry. There are no other categories here.

Next year, I’m going to push to save our time and not roast the pumpkin seeds. We can stock up on extra seaweed for the boy and we all can have a spoonful of spices and honey and call it a day. And for the love of humanity, don’t get me started on roasted chestnuts. I’m surprisingly ok with open fires.


Sadly Yours,

Jason Spafford

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